In da house.

So Tanner Tuesday was excellent and he did a Cribs post MTV-style and I am totally copying him because it's a great idea so this is Ike's Life - Cribs!

And this is a picture of me on my couch and I know everybody knows my couch, but it wouldn't be my crib if I didn't post it because it's the place I spend most of my time and my mom bought new pillows because the other ones had tongue stains on them and they were downgraded to cat pillows - ha ha cats.

And this is a picture of me on the big bed where I spend the second most of my time and I almost didn't get to sleep there anymore because a long time ago, soon after my balls were cut off, I used to mark on the bed by my mom and dad's pillows and that made them really mad, especially when I did it in the middle of the night and they woke up with pee by their faces. I don't do that anymore because I've learned to be a good dog.

And this is a picture of my mom and dad's bathroom and I like to sit on the rug and wait while they shower because I want to make sure they don't drown because I'm kind of a Saint Bernard like that. And that's Odin in the background - you met him before because he's the cat I like to lay my head on sometimes and yeah, I know it's weird.


And this is a picture of the litter box and it usually has a gate in front of it so it's hard for me to get into it because I love Kitty Roca because it's my favorite.

And this is a picture of the front door where I wait patiently when I have to go do my business but sometimes my mom and dad don't know I'm waiting there and I let a little slip 'cause I wait so long and my mom bought Poochie Bells a few days ago and she's like "go potty? ring the bells" all the time now - whatever that means.

And this is my kennel where I sit and wait forever all alone when my mom and dad leave some days and it's comfy but I don't really want to be there but I tried to chew on a cabinet door once when I was in the kitchen alone so this is where I have to be until I get a second chance.

And this is the special Boston terrier section of the big bookshelf where my mom and dad keep the Meg stuff and that's a statue that some guy in England made and painted just like Meg and someday they will get one for me too, but they have the real thing so why bother?

And this is the best place in the whole house because it's where I eat which is my favorite thing to do and my mom bought me new elevated bowls which really help with all the gagging and hacking stuff that I do a lot when I eat and my mom was worried that I would get kibble in my lungs if I kept it up.

Snow walk.

So we went on a snow walk today and my mom took some embarrassing pictures of me in the snow and she made me wear my Cosby sweater because she thought the colors would look good against the stark white and she decided to post some pictures of me looking really doofy (I need to figure out how to post pictures because it's really hard to talk her out of posting pee pictures - what's up with that?) But I guess the walk wasn't really that bad because it's kind of warm out and apart from the snow under my feet, it was ok - notice tongue out in some pictures. So here are some pictures of my snow walk and me looking really nerdy.

Tongue.

I don't know what's going on here - why do they always have to post these pictures?

I'm trying to find the right poop spot which is really hard
and my mom has to stop to take pictures. Arrrrgh.

One year of art school ten years ago and she thinks she's an artist.

12 inches of snow.

So all the news people said this big snow storm was coming and it didn't come and didn't come and then last night it came ... yuck! And now going for walkies is miserable again 'cause I can only walk on sidewalks that are scooped and not all sidewalks are scooped and even when they are scooped, they still have some snow on them and that makes me limp. So now I'm stuck on the couch again and I'm so bored and treats and toys do nothing for my cabin fever and I don't even care about going to Petsmart to walk around because I want to be outside rolling around in the grass and pooping in my poop field instead of on sidewalks - what's a dog to do? Does anyone have a cure for cabin fever - Joe Stains and Tanner and Bentley and Niko get "burned in" in Arizona so what do you guys do when it's so hot you burn your feet? I wish I could be like Martha and KST who love the snow - how do you do it???
And this is another picture of me being bored on the couch. If anyone wants to see me in the snow, my mom will take some pictures so just let me know.

What my block looks like.

So today it was 46 degrees and I finally got to go for decent walkies although it was just around the block because I got cold. And I thought I would show you guys what around my block looks like.
This is a picture of my street and it's in a really cool neighborhood and there's an ice cream shop a few blocks away that makes their own ice cream and they have Frosty Paws which is my favorite and my mom and dad have a friend who ate Frosty Paws by accident and he said it was really gross and he almost barfed - what's up with that?


This is a picture of the dogs that live on the other side of my alley and no one ever pays attention to them and they bark all the time and the collie is kind of mean and he beats up the beagle who is a very nice girl. And they live outside all the time - even when it's negative ten billion degrees outside and that isn't cool for any dog so I kind of feel bad for them even though I don't really like other dogs much. (except for you guys)


And this is a picture of the bush that I really like to pee on because all the other dogs in the neighborhood pee on it and I'm totally part of the "in" crowd.

And this is a picture of me being cold and wanting to go in. Notice, no tongue.

And last is a picture of my mom on Laguna Beach on Monday without me and she was chilly too!

My mom and dad are home.

Holy crap, that was a long vacation! My mom and dad finally picked me up today and I was away forever at Tory's house and Tory said I did fine even though I was really scared for the first two days. He said my mind was "locked" with fear and we were learning to release that and he is going to teach my mom how to help me so I can be a better dog.
My mom said they spent a lot of time walking on the beaches in California while I spent a lot of time freezing in Minnesota but I'm glad they had fun but I'm still jealous. I'm also really glad I'm home and I can sleep on the couch again and eat greenies and stuff and I got a bath tonight because my mom and dad were away from dogs for a long time and didn't realize how good I smelled.
I'm going to bed now - woo hoo, the big bed with my parents! I'll write more tomorrow or the next day because I'm really, really tired and there's no picture of me because I was away.

Be my Valentine!

So it's almost Valentine's Day and I don't have a Valentine except for my mom but she doesn't count and my mom and dad are unveiling the Valentine's surprise which is really awesome because it's about me. So my goal is to have some Valentine offers because I don't want to be alone on the most romantic day of the year.
Here is a picture of me offering myself as a Valentine and the big surprise is here too!

Poop, pee and no California.

I've been a bad, bad boy. Yesterday night, we went to my grandma's house for pizza crusts and I pooped in the kitchen and I didn't even tell anyone that I had to go. I just did the hunch and pooped two turds on the floor and my grandma couldn't believe how big they were and she said they are as big as Pearl's poos and Pearl is a lab/German shepherd mix. And later I was even worse and I peed on the floor right in front of my grandpa who is a huge crab and he was really mad which I guess he should be because good dogs don't pee and poop in the house. I don't know what my deal was last night but maybe I'm just mad because my mom and dad are leaving without me on Wednesday to go to California and it's supposed to be really warm there and it's really cold here. And my mouth hurts. So I guess I'm just posting for a little camaraderie and sympathy because even though my grandma's dogs are good and never pee or poop in the house I know other dogs do so please share your stories with me so my mom doesn't think I'm the only bad poopy dog in the whole world.
And here is a picture of me sunbathing with my mom last summer like I want to do in California but I can't go because the airline thinks I am too big.

Lazy Sunday.

So I'm still recovering from tooth day and today is Sunday which is my favorite because my mom and dad are super lazy like me on Sunday and I spend most of the day snuggling with them and then we go to my grandma's house and I get to lick lots of plates and I get really unusual treats. And Odin and me are coming to a sort of understanding because he likes snuggling as much as me and we have to share my dad because he is really warm and kind of squishy. And we've also learned to share my mom too because she is also warm and squishy and she doesn't want me to post this picture of her in her PJs because she said she looks horrible but I think she just looks like my mom and that she never looks horrible, maybe a little goofy though.
My mom and dad leave on Wednesday and I have to go stay with Tory so I won't be able to post until they get back on the following Monday. I am really nervous and so is my mom and don't forget to check back for the big Valentine's surprise on Tuesday because it's about me and it's really good.
Here is a picture of me and my dad and Odin snuggling and a picture of me laying on Odin because he is warm but not really squishy because he is fourteen so he's kind of bony but still fluffy and then there's the picture that my mom hates.

Tooth fairy.

So this morning, I got up and ran to my dish because I get breakfast first thing and my dad didn't give me breakfast and then my mom didn't give me breakfast either and I kept reminding them but they were stupid or something and didn't get it. And then I had to go to work with my mom which I hate because it's sooooo boring but instead of just putting me in a kennel, they started sticking me with needles and taking my blood.
And then later they gave me this stuff in my leg - after they poked my leg with this huge needle and put an implant in it- and then I woke up later and my mouth felt weird and I was missing two teeth - two teeth! And my mom told me later they had to saw the teeth in half because that's how you get big teeth out and now I have stitches in my mouth and I have to eat canned food which is my favorite.














So even now I feel really weird because they gave me lots of drugs with lots of needles and I barfed twice today, once when I was running and the other time I was just standing there. Now I have to wait for the tooth fairy so I can get new chewies so I guess it's totally worth it to lose two teeth for chewies.
Here are pictures of me on drugs and a picture of my tooth sawed in half and a picture of me eating after I recovered a little and then a picture of my teeth that were taken out but my mom glued them back together so I don't get four chewies even though I told her I deserve them.
And another thing, when I was recovering from their sleep drugs, I was howling! Do you believe it? I am totally a wolf.

Bananas.

So I don't know if you guys know this about me, but I really like food and not just dog food but anything my mom and dad eat. And lately, I really like fruit and my mom is on a banana kick so bananas are my favorite and yesterday, I tried apple which might be my favorite too. My mom puts bananas on her cereal and sometimes I get to lick the bowl, but sometimes she lets Duncan lick the bowl because he likes food like me. And I really like all the usual stuff like bacon and pizza and other good stuff like that. What kind of food do you guys like?
My dog food is really good, too, and it's a prescription hypoallergenic diet because my mom is a vet tech and she always thinks there is something wrong with me especially because I barf in the morning if I don't get a snack before bed and an antacid and another pill that helps me not feel barfy in the morning. But anyway, the hypoallergenic food makes me less farty because my farts were really frequent and made my mom and dad's eyes water even though I thought they were really good.
Here is a picture of me eating a banana. And the other picture is me laying in the sun which I really like to do in the winter and I don't understand how the sun can be so warm when outside is so cold.
Oh and another thing, my mom and dad have been working on a very special Valentine's Day surprise, so make sure you look at my blog on the 13th because that is when I am going to post the surprise and I saw it and it's really cool.

Are those Bugle Boy jeans you're wearing?

So my mom and dad went to Target last night and when they go to Target, they always look at dog clothes because Target has such cool clothes and my favorite sweater - the blue one that's in my header - is from there. And now they have this new line of Urban Rocker clothes that has T-shirts with skulls and crossbones and Security jackets (which I wanted, but my dad wouldn't buy) and they bought me a pair of jeans that have studs by the pockets that are really cool. So we tried them on last night and they fit really good and I walk a little funny in them but they are warm and I look really, really cool so I like to wear them. And my grandpa saw me in them and he hates everything and he laughed so I know I look good and my mom called me Mr. Fancypants. And here are some pictures of me in my new jeans looking really, really good. And in the tongue picture, I'm eating peanut butter, not baby diaper which would probably be my favorite. Oh, and my mom is making me admit that I peed in the house last night, which you would do too because the pee freezes before it's even out of your body because it's so cold out.

In case we get stranded.

So, it's been super, duper cold out and today, it's 3:43pm and I haven't even peed yet. I went out and pooped and then I started to cry because I was so cold I thought my wiener was going to freeze off so I didn't pee. It's -4 degrees, but with the wind chill, it's -24 degrees so that means your skin freezes in like 15 minutes or something and I don't want to look like one of those stray cats that doesn't have ear tips because they froze off.
And tonight it's going to get down to -15 degrees without the chilly wind so I am not going out to pee and I don't care what anyone says because I don't want to die. My mom and dad are talking about moving and I think that's a really good idea because I don't want them to die either.
And another thing, the cold weather advisory people said that people should keep a winter survival kit in their cars so if the car breaks down they will have stuff to keep them from freezing their ears off. I am going to make my survival kit now because we are going to my grandma's house and if we get stranded I will need my blanket, boots, at least one jacket and one sweater, a scarf, a couple of chewies in case we are stranded for a long time, a heating pad and lots of food because I will need to get fatter. I want to take the couch too and the moving pictures box so we have something to do, but my mom said we can't.
And this is a picture of me getting ready to go out.