Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Midnight bath.

So it's 12:33 am and the worst thing just happened - I just had a bath! And I don't know why now because we should all be in bed sleeping, but my mom has been threatening me and saying the b-word a lot lately and she said that my feet smell like Fritos and my breath smells like garbage so I got a bath and teeth brushies and ear cleanies.
I'm naked in these pics; so puppies, put your paws over your eyes. (Hey Martha - wink, wink.)

And thanks for all the nice words for my grandpa - he had a PET scan today and we don't know the results yet, but I told my mom that they found three cats and two dogs, but she said that isn't what a pet scan is and I said um, yeah, I know what a pet scan is but she said I'm wrong. Whatever.

And how could they torture this face?

Thursday, September 20, 2007

The Stranger.

Sorry I've been a stranger, everyone ... my mom has been really super busy and we went to a wedding last weekend and stayed in a hotel with an m on purpose because all the resorts on the North Shore are like super expensive, but this hotel with an m didn't have blood on the TV and it was clean and had a huge lumberjack in the parking lot. But guess who used all the juice in her camera at the stupid wedding and didn't take any pics of me or the huge lumberjack? WTF?
And also, my grandpa (not the one who was just visiting) went to the doctor and they found a spot on his lungs and tomorrow he gets a scan, so send good vibes his way.
So I am really sorry I haven't been to too many blogs lately. I still think you all are totally awesome.
And my friend Randi gave me this. Thanks for spreading the luv, Randi!

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

I'm Back... and with a quickness!

As the world slumbers...

As its guard is dropped in a false sense of security...

There is one who stalks the night, giving credence to the phrase "cat-like reflexes."

His name is Black Duncan...

and he in one with the night.

He is I.

I is.. I mean, I am...

Black Duncan.

And I am here to interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you the inside story. The one that no Dog - especially a little brown one whose tongue is always sticking out like half-cooked bacon - wants you to see.

Prepare yourself for the shame - the embarrassment - the horror!

What follows is a renegade transmission from under the bed, I mean the Underground, where darkness resides and grows stronger each minute.

This video seems to be the awesome training video of a well-oiled Ninja machine, but the viewer quickly becomes silent witness to the bumbling mimicry of your beloved Ike.

I apologize for having to release this video and shatter the image you have of the "dog" you thought you knew. But the darkness could no longer conceal this shameful beast for the cat-wannabe he really is.

Without further ade.. adue... ad.. er.. waiting any longer...

Here is...

The Feather Wrangler
in stunning low-def.

There is no sound because I didn't want to shame him further with his screams of "Kee-yah," and "Ka-pow!"

His brown "ninja star" got so much camera time, it's a good thing we don't yet have the technology for smell-o-vision.

I would have gotten more footage, but he noticed the camera rolling and shut it off.
His middle name should be "ant-catch-a-stupid-feather-toy"

Now THIS is what mad Ninja Skilz look like!

Black Duncan Out!

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

Middle name.

So I don't really have a middle name so my dad gave me one and it's Andy and I think Martha would agree.
Think about it ...
Sound it out ...

A - always hungry
N - never full
D - dog of distinction
Y - your best buddy

Saturday, September 1, 2007

And the winner is ...


Here's her winning entry!
He's Joe Stains
Living with the Doofus makes him go insane
He's Joe Stains
Eating too many hot dogs puts his butt in pain
She will receive a fabulous prize!!!!

Joe Stains said Stanley was a close 2nd with these catchy lines:
He's Joe Stains
He's so HOT he even dates Claire Danes
He's Joe Stains
Like burning acid running through my veins

Thanks to all who participated, and thanks to Mr. Joe Stains for judging the contest!