Monday, October 1, 2007

Interview.

First off - all the crossed paws worked and my grandpa is in the clear - no cancer, but he has to have a follow up CT in 1 year just to make sure the dodgy area doesn't change. Thanks for all the well-wishes all you doggies and hamster!

So my buddy, Balboa, is a hard-hitting journalist and he interviewed me. Here is the story ...

1. What would you describe as the perfect date for you and your sweetie Martha?

Well first, I would pick Martha up in a vintage Rolls Royce, because she’s a really classy gal, but my mom would have to drive because my legs are too short and then we could be in the backseat together which would be awesome.



Then we would go through the drive-thru at Culvers and get burgers and frozen custard, but no fries for me because I tend to barf them up in cars and I don’t think my mom would want me barfing in an old Rolls. Then we would cruise the town with our heads out the window barking at all the dogs we see so they could see how cool we are. Then I would take her to Cartier and buy her a custom collar with a diamond tag that says her name and number on it and it would be engraved “Love, Ikes.” It would look something like this.

Then I would take her home for a game of bitey face and we would roll and snort on the rug for a while and then probably fall asleep because we would have been awake for like three hours or something. And the next day we would go to Minnehaha Falls and walk around and maybe wade in the shallow pool for a while and then I would ask her to marry me because she’s the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen!

2. You've been asked to design the "perfect" doggie treat, what would you come up with?

The perfect treat would not make me gain weight and every time I take a bite, it would grow back and it would taste like peanut butter and would have non-toxic chocolate on it and when I’m hot, it would be cold and when I’m cold, it would be hot.

3. If you were allowed to get a job, what would you do? How much would you get paid?


I would be a professional mommy and daddy kisser (not like when I was a professional puppy maker though, because that was torture and I would never want to go back to that.) And I think I would have to make $8.50 per kiss and I would kiss a lot so I could pay back my mom’s student loans because then she could work less and spend more time with me and more time with me = more kisses = more money = no more student loans! Man, am I a great guy!



4. Would you choose between a three-month supply of peanut butter and cheese filled kongs OR laying on the couch with your mom for 24 hours straight?

I think I would pick the Kongs, because my mom is really lazy and will lie on the couch with me all the time anyway.

5. If you could tell your mom and dad one thing, what would you say? Why?

Warning: this might be a little sappy.

I would tell my mom and dad that I love them sooooo much and that I am so thankful that they adopted me and that they are patient with me because I am weird with other people but I can’t help it because of what happened to me before and I think it would be called post-traumatic stress disorder if I were a naked ape. I would tell my mom and dad that they are the best when they defend me when people say I’m a freak when I approach them and then get scared and run away and thanks for putting up with my awesome, rank farts and the tongue prints on the couch and when I accidentally poop on the floor sometimes and pretty much that I love them more than anyone else in the whole world.


These are the rules:
1. If you are interested in being interviewed, leave me a comment saying, 'interview me.'
2. I will respond by posting five questions for you. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with a post containing your answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

35 comments:

Stanley said...

Ike Man!

That last answer was not sappy, buddy! You were keeping it real, and that's all *I* want to see.

I had no idea you were so close to marriage, Ike. Did you use this post to ask her the big question? Has she said anything about it yet? Hey, I wish you success, man. She's a hot tamale and a sweet thing too! You two deserve each other!

Goober love,
Stanley

Pee Ess
I'd let you interview me, but I still haven't posted yet the interview questions Balboa asked ME!

Lorenza said...

Hi, Ike
I am so glad to hear that your grandpa is fine! Please tell him to take care himself!
That was a great interview! Are those your dreaming plans??
Have a good night, kisser boy!
Lorenza

Scrappy and Pebbles said...

Love your answers to your questions very entertaining

Tail wags
Scrappy and Pebbles

Girl Girl Hamster said...

Ike, that's such a pawsome interview and you're such a romantic doggie.

~ Girl girl

Joe Stains said...

Ike man, your date sounds AWESOME but I would prefer the everlasting treat! I would love to be interviewed by you!

Huskee Boy said...

Hi Ike,
That pic of you sticking your tongue out is hilarious.. Mom saved it and is using it as her wallpaper!

Ume said...

those r pawsome answers, Ike!
i bet Martha would say YES if u ever ask!

Maggie & Mitch said...

You have awesome taste, Ike! Martha is one lucky girl! She's going to blind everybody when she wears that collar!

Love ya lots,
Maggie

Balboa & Mommy said...

Ike, awesome answers, that would be a fabulous date!!!!!!

Oh man, what a great job, I bet you would be a millionare in less than a month.

Glad your Grandpa's okay, keep us updated.

Frenchie Snorts
Balboa

Ruby Bleu said...

Wow Ike...proposing to Martha! That's big news or is it just a dream of yours? It's not good to tease a girl like that. All your answers were pawsome!!! Especially the last one!

Lots of Licks, Ruby

Luckie Girl said...

Those were great answers Ike. I never knew how romantic you were! Martha is so fortunate to have you. Mom and I appreciate your kind thoughts.

Super Boy & Baby-Licious said...

We love about the way you wrote about your parents. It was so sweet.

Love
Boy n Baby

Suki & Joey said...

Oh, wow, that collar is bootiful! Uh...maybe you could have TWO girlfriends? Just kidding, I'm not a gold digger! ;)

That treat sounds great. Are you gonna start making it soon?

Puggy kisses,
Suki

Sophie Brador said...

Rock on Grandpa!!! Now, I'm going back to read the interview.

xo
SB

Ferndoggle said...

Who said you were a freak??? I'm going to send them a giant box of poop!

If you get around to patenting those treats, sign me up for 50 boxes of them. I stole Mom's plastic card.

sherman

Two Wild and Crazy Guyz said...

We enjoyed your interview Ikes. You are a pretty deep dude. Especially when it comes to Miss Martha. What a romantic!

Ozzie & Rocky

Poppy said...

Wow, Ike. You are an awesome and interesting fellow. I'm glad I read your interview. I poo on the floor sometimes too, so we have that in common. Yay us! Come by and visit my bloggy any time!

Poppy

Martha said...

Oh my dog, Ikes! I loves you long time!! Yes! Love, Martha

Russell said...

good job

russ

wally said...

Man! You got the romance skills! My idea dates mostly involve raw meaty bones, football games, and looooong naps.

I've gotta tell you, you're one lucky dude and I'm so glad you rescued your apes but I think they're pretty lucky, too.

wally.

ps. Great news with the gramps!

Seadra & Zoe said...

Wow.... We would love a collar like that!! How much would one of those cost?

Love, Seadra and Zoe

Lacy said...

woofies ike, sooo happys for urs g-pa, was good newes...my mamas had to have dat tested too, wasnt as goods news for her..but its ok, ur answeres wuz pawsome, ike..

b safe,
;)lacylulu

Sir Chance-Lot said...

ohohoh...please interview me!!!!

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