Wednesday, January 24, 2007

This is what I think of cats.

My mom said I have to introduce the other creatures in the house. And when I say creatures, I mean cats. There are three of them. And mostly I just ignore them, but sometimes I play "get the Duncan" where dad hangs Duncan above me and Duncan swats at me and I jump around and tease him. Duncan thinks he's tough, but I could really kick his fluffy little butt if I wanted to which I don't because I'm a good dog and I don't want to get into trouble because that means no treats and no treats is really bad. He's very naughty because he's one year old. And another thing. Sometimes Duncan gets turds stuck to his foofy skunk tail which I love 'cause then I get to eat them. The kitty bathroom is blocked off, so it's a rare treat. And one more thing. When Duncan gets in trouble, they put him in my cage which he can sometimes get open and I wish he would teach me how but he won't cause he's a cat and cats are like that.

And then there's Odin. He's the cranky old man. He's fourteen. He loves mom and dad and everyone in the whole world (except me and Duncan.) If someone robbed the house, he would offer to hold the bag. Mom and Dad call him the ghost cat. Not because he's white - they're not that dumb - but because they will be sitting on the couch watching the moving pictures box and then they realize that he is on their lap purring and they have been petting him and they have no idea how long he's been there. Sometimes, even though he doesn't like me and only if I'm wearing a sweater which tricks him, he will lay across me which I hate because I don't like cats laying across me. Here's Odin.

And then there's Saffron. She's mom's little girl. She's nine. She sleeps in her special basket all day. And Mom says she never does anything wrong except when she's on the back of the couch she purrs and pulls Mom's hair and bites her head which makes Mom scream. I wouldn't scream, I would bite her back, but then I would get in trouble and trouble means no treats and we all know no treats is bad. We pretty much leave each other alone. Oh, and she's orange and a girl and girl cats are not really supposed to be orange like Boston terriers aren't supposed to be brown which I am so we sort of have something in common. But that's it.

And here's a picture of me because it's my blog and who wants to look at cats anyway. Mom says I'm being selfish, but it is my blog. And below, this is what I think of cats.

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